The only one thing that you requested was for the trash to be taken out. A little bit later you discover your partner didn’t do it. When you ask why they didn’t do it, your partner says “I never heard you ask me”. Curious how that works, how your partner didn’t hear the one thing you requested from them. This “selective hearing” is a common indication that communication is breaking down.
This “selective hearing” is frequently viewed as a kind of character flaw. It’s like you’re accusing somebody of deliberately not listening. But it’s possible that the real culprit behind your selective hearing might not be a short attention span, it might be the early phases of hearing loss.
Selective hearing – what is it?
You’ve most likely had at least one or more situations in your life where somebody has accused you of not listening, even if no one specifically used the term “selective hearing”. Selective hearing happens when you can clearly hear information that’s helpful to you but conveniently miss the bit that’s negative. You hear the part about making a delicious meal but miss the part about cleaning up the dishes. That sort of thing.
As a behavior, selective hearing is very common. But this behavior is more common in men than women, according to some research.
How individuals are socialized does give some context and it may be tempting to make some assumptions from this. But hearing health is probably another major factor. If your “selective hearing” starts to become more common, it could be a hint that you may have undiagnosed hearing loss.
Communication can be impacted by hearing loss
Undiagnosed hearing loss can definitely make communication a great deal harder. That’s most likely not that surprising.
But one notable indication of hearing loss is communication issues.
When hearing loss is in those really early phases, there won’t be very many obvious symptoms. Your tv may get a bit louder. When go out to your local haunt, you have a difficult time hearing what people are saying. You most likely just assume it’s because of the loud music. But besides situations like that, you may never even observe how loud everyday sounds can be. This allows your hearing to slowly (but surely) decline. You scarcely notice the problem until you’re at the point where you often have trouble hearing conversations.
Your partner is becoming worried about the health of your hearing
The people around you will most likely be concerned. Yes, selective hearing is a fairly common annoyance (even more annoying when you already feel as if nobody is listening to you). But that frustration often becomes concern when they acknowledge that hearing loss may be the actual culprit.
And your partner may want you to find out what’s going on by having you schedule a hearing test.
It’s significant to pay attention to your partner’s concerns. Have an open discussion and consider that they are coming from a place of caring and not just annoyance.
Early hearing loss has a few other indicators
If your selective hearing has become worse over time, it might be worth keeping an eye out for some of these other early indications of hearing loss. Here are some of those signs:
- Turning the volume up on your mobile phone, television, or radio
- Hearing in crowds is challenging
- Speech sounds distant or muffled
- Requesting that people talk slower and speak up
- Consonants are hard to distinguish
If you experience any of these symptoms, you should call us for a hearing test.
Always safeguard your hearing
Protecting your hearing is so essential to preventing hearing loss. Limit your exposure to noisy settings (or at least wear earmuffs or earplugs when you have to be around noise). Hearing aids can also help you communicate effectively, which can smooth over many rough spots that your hearing loss may have caused in the first place.
A diminishing attention span will be to blame for most selective hearing incidents in your life. But you may want to take it as a signal that it’s time to get a hearing test when people around you start to observe your selective hearing getting worse.
